However, if your Beloved withdraws himself from the relationship for
a time, and if you cannot experience your exquisite love play, will you still love him?In
Kama Radha, according to those who have been in it, you, the individual soul, stop loving
and stop giving if for a prolonged time you feel there is no response, no appropriate love
play from your Lord. You wonder why you have loved so long, and how the Lord could be so
thoughtless of his devotee, the Radha. All this occurs at a very high level, however
primitive the selfish response may seem to our minds as we strive to equate it with normal
human emotional terms.
So, even at a sublime height, a person in Kama Radha, a mood which seems to be one of
total loving and giving, there is, even in your reformed sense of self, an expectation or
a demand which you are placing on the Lord. You become agonizingly frustrated and your
heart feels stretched beyond its ability to stretch.
Your sudden self-preoccupation as a thwarted lover sometimes takes a long period of
time to grow out of and the whole sincerity of your love, even at this colossal level, is
brought into question. The entire progression of your love and intimacy through the moods
seems a contradiction. You lament your Beloved’s absence and endure while
experiencing extreme suffering.
